So here is to another season that we are clinging to God to show us his prefect plan for our family. Being pregnant for the 3rd time is a miracle and blessing in itself but knowing I have no living children from the other pregnancies breaks my heart. Even though things have not turned out the way we thought, we still hold onto God's word. I still believe He answers prayers and knows the desires of our heart.
This Mother's Day was very strange for me. I really didn't know how to feel or what to feel. We went and visited Landon's grave this morning. It is so peaceful but heart wrenching out there. I prayed over all the Momma's that were celebrating Mother's Day without their babies to hold. It seems like as much as I go out there I would be use to going to a burial plot but I'm not. It still hurts and I always ask myself, "is this really my life?" But once I saw Van's sweet face at my mom's house (he had to spend the night there sat. night) it made a lot of my sorrow go away. I will always have a large hole in my heart for my babies who are not in my arms but Van does fill the rest of it up. He is such a big ball of happy energy and I thank God for him all the time! Even though no one spoke of Landon's name today, I thought about him all day and how much I miss him.
It is so hard to believe we are on our 5th child but we are still just trying for the 2nd child. That is just crazy to us. We are so believing and have faith in our God that he knows the right path for our new baby! This baby is in God's hands!
This is our prayer for our new miracle and I ask that you are in agreement with us.
Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you so much for blessing us with another miracle. We ask that you put a hedge of protection over our baby and our family. We ask that you let this baby grow and function the way you intended for creation to be. We ask for a full term baby. We ask for a strong cervix to hold this precious miracle growing inside. We ask for healing in my body.We ask that you take away our fears and let us enjoy being pregnant. We ask for wise doctors and staff. We ask that you settle my nerves and accept the fact that I am pregnant again. That I embrace this baby as if it was my first pregnancy. That you give us peace and hope during these months. That you surround us with loving and strong prayer warriors for this baby and our family. That you supply helpers when we might need help. God we just ask that your Will be done during this pregnancy and the walk with you. We cling to you and your Word. It says that when there are 2 or more gathered it shall be done. We so believe your Word and have faith that we will be holding a healthy full term baby the second week of December. Thank you Heavenly Father for letting us be parents to so many children in our hearts! We love you.
I also want to ask that anytime you think of us and our baby that you say a pray for us! We need as many prayers as we can get! I will keep you posted on the growth of our precious baby and the processes we are going through.
Thank you so much for reading this and caring for our family! It's been a long journey so far but we are looking forward to this new journey that we are on!